A Brazilian Fish Is More Than A Washed Away Memory

People were once good here in the Netherlands, black or white-ing, parasiting was not a modus operandi taken for granted. We did not work in framework or with rifts and polemic causing features and benefits caused by not saying a word anymore.

Mexia Link Never Asked For

I somehow was a focal point due to an observation that started and continued discourse continued ever since posting severql posts and drawings on the crispr or genetics of life article in the New Yorker that sparked a communal with hunt and an incentive to excessive testing for selfish genes to be eradicated from behaviour in a nature versus nurture matter that overanalysed my work and homosexuality and essentially killed the gay scene and my twelve year career as an illustrator for international media with over five hundred publications since I started out. The new ethos was freedom of labour and I had been a medium in that matter for those watching over my shoulder. The fish now takes more than bait. It tells you off and interferes while insulting your results refusing publication since isolated fish cc roles have access to Samsung owners.

(I had been an Apple adapt since my first Power Mac bought in Art School days, a second hand model with integrated use of the Wacom tablet and pen, I was late in realizing this in now way had any real expressive or natural ways to create 2D images and I had lost the skill to sketch. But I understood early on that with press and media opting for one dollar stock or online image subscriptions the profession of image makers was in nee of authentiity, originality and most of all a unique handwriting of the maker whose own identity could be reflected in the process of making. Problem was I could just not draw. Creativity essentially means finding ways to handle with the process of something, as inpossible capturing true reality can be, and by trial and error finding cheats, tricks and techniques to create a style that is conveying the artistic direction in mind. So that goes to show. I knew it was going to be an existential crisis of sorts and print media commissioned work had indeed dried up fully pretty fast after dailyvdeadlines had run my life for over a decade.

Another day another routine

Make a mark, pick up a pencil and draw a line. It sounds simple but after ten years doing even the drafts bzfore the sign of point in digital imlustration programmes of Adobe I had fear to draw and had realised I let my work become a tedious routine of making vector point after vector shape on long eight ours pzr day of dNow the trend of AI as propagated by Samsung and the like it has created a generation that is consuming infinte streams and scrolling pages with anonymous work. An angel whispered in my ear that now would be the moment to drop the 'can' from what came to be a new tech-savvy generation of artists stifled by censors and fearful of the blank canvas and the confronting pens and chalks. Find first attempts of sketching 3D outdoor and indoor settings with people in a series (Don't) Talk To Me in the Art Shop section on this site.

A Gift From

The big Brazilian matches could have made for a first clumsy attempt of a sketchy illustrated story on my personal meetings with the likes of Victor and Carioca, the first hunky latin types I dated with and wanted to tell a tale with of how coincidence in meetings and flirting online in apps had become a new metaphysical matches and during these six months I gave myself to mess around with trying to be relevant again for a commercial purpose as in something that could be published. There was a third Brazilian, Dino and I wanted more than have sex but play we never asked to be the bullseye for. I want your sex, to quote George Michael but was left with a new type of play. The fish have helped clear my memiry and bring out a narrative. The scandal of singularization and martner matching on Grindr and Gayromeo, the credit cqrd bimls with club visits and even an attempt at play, tips, pqy, fish and break was a shock and awe but, snort, soon after these wild months or yeats m career was over and I was in a debt crisis I now still have to endure an extreme multitude of fish for. The boldest is Victor in all his pure charisma and forbidden fruit I could imagine this would be a winner. Ond month after not being able to draw a line or circle even, I remembered also how Thiago and Jesuino as well as Fabiano had told me I was not like other Dutch but had a Brazilian soul. And go was all that was echoing in my mind these days. Modest first attempts at Untitled 1 below.

I had to run away as I was told and try to catch that plan B cycle in improv styl There was a new wave of internationalism and the young designers from Lisbon or New York or Milan I just could not compete with anymore. This all happened suddenly.

Profession Under Pressure

With one dollar stock image first appeared it was quickly a global market that of the editorial image content I had in the times of prosperity, over a decade and some years more so gratefully made advantage of by using the Getty and Corbis databases as reference material for those jeans and sneakers wearing grpup of ypungsters standing under a palmtree full length I had traced away but always making sure to come up with new interesting compositions Been caught stealing? Computer sais YES, or now was it the computer? It is hatd to draw on a screen and combining hands carrying water buckets with a field with spring tulims in the backgrounf had become somewhat clumsy or to recall Brinda, the art-director of Refinery and the lovely people I worked with for a Merck Mechanism Of Action animation to visualize the working of a medicine callef Emend. I toldBrinda near the end of my deadline I would be travelling to the Champagne region in France with my boyfriend for the Easter holiday and she laughed it off, after telling her that I spent over sixteen hours trying to get the vectors right in that final scene in which she had, as we agreed to in the brief, hold the carton package in her hand in front of her whilst standing in a pretty much full frontal position. The entire Ava protagonist was based on a series of digital photo's for which I had rented a female model to pose in certain positions in the days after the assignment was given and stpryboard detaims and posed were left mostly to me.